Friday, May 19, 2017

I know some people will moan that how can I give Knob of the Week to a guy who finished second in the Premier League whilst the bdo continue to fuck up week after week but the simple reality is this week he was a deserving knob.
The bdo did fuck up but they are more knob of the year  material.
Seriously Krusty is a choking cunt, all through the night I expected to see the dope fuck up and by fuck he is consistent.
This is the part where I use analogies, swear words pics, and other such shit to rip the choking bastard  apart, but between a combination of me pissed and expecting him to fuck up, I decided why bother.
Here is a guy who has won fuckall of note , and yes some will say the UK Open but that was won in a depleted field,
I will give him credit, he is shit hot at busting up euro jobbers, players off form, and players on the decline but  when it comes to the crunch in majors in a full field the guy is sadly lacking..
The saddest part is I wanted him to win. The thought of that obese whore stiffing cunt lauding it over others again was unbearable.

So again,this is the part where I post a photoshop pic, make some type of witty comment, but I can't be arsed, its like I have accepted this is what we have come to expect from him..

I am sure the scum of the bdo who read this site and love getting offended by my words  will  be thinking where is the abuse and hate that they can get upset over. So let me allay some of that for you, you are all scum, the bdo is shit, and ye 2 faced dole sponging ignorant cunts who claim to be fanatics of the bdo can kiss my Irish white asshole, which I am sure is the right height for the giro dwarfs that infest the piss soaked community halls that is an embarrassment to darts.Ye can tweet each other and all the facebook warriors who think giving me a slap will somehow cause divine intervention where  me in a hospital bed will bring about a surge in tickets for that cluster fuck of a Catas Trophy and sorting me out will lead to a sudden interest by TV companies  so ye lie in your council houses and squats and drug addicted friends couches sadly trying to convince yourselves a new era is on the way..

I can hear it now....drunken fat potbellied low IQ morons thinking he would not say that to my face, feel free to pay me a visit.. One dysfunctional cunt on BDO FanZone warned me that Warty would see to me., that should be fun,whats the charge on step ladders  as luggage on flights to Ireland?
These inbred genetic  cunts who have fuckall in their sad existence that they cling to some outdated drinking club under the pretense of darts,and anyone that dares to point out the fuck ups must therefore be an internet warrior..

So let me say Fuck you All, the scumbag Jacklins the Williams and every single degeneate sub human cunt that thinks sorting me out will fix the calamity that is the BDO..

Speaking of the BDO, , I was looking forward to the live comedy on TV, but it seems they cannot even get it on TV. Ticket sales are so atrocious I almost felt bad for them, it only last around 6 seconds though..
Maybe this stream will break the global audience of 300 viewers.

A mention for James Wade who is dropping like a stone in the rankings and who is playing utter shit, his performance last weekend on the euro tour not only made sure he stays below Chizzy in the rankings, it was a fuckin embarrassment. Part of me hopes he is fucked out of next years PL and like the lats time he got kicked out hegets his arse in gear, as his 90 averages is not worth a fuck these days.

I was gonna write some shit about fireball features Glen Durrant  and his recent podcast where he made excuses for his loss in the Grand Slam to the sweaty postman but fuck it, the disfigured cunt ain't worth the effort.

Also I see the darts forum that is dying a slow death, the former stars of darts this week would not give out their prize of a dartboard to the winner. Seems since he is American he is not entitled to the prize on offer, which is tantamount to racism, then they have a history of not giving out prizes depending on who wins them.

On the topic of the choking cunt wright I saw this post which was succinct and to the point

However, special mention must go to Krusty the Clown, AKA Peter Wright, the fake Scot, who, to be fair,over the past few years has taken the professional game by storm and become one of the best players on the planet. His choke in the 20th leg of the Premier League Final against MvG ranks as high, if not higher than Mike Gregory's epic choke against Feel at Lakeshite back in 1992. Six missed match darts at one of the easier doubles on the board saw Billy Smarts Lovechild totally disintegrate and allow MvG to get his mucky paws on the Premier League pot yet again.
I was half tempted to apologise for this weeks blog lacking the enthusiasm and dedication of previous weeks , then thought why bother bother since every cunt who gets offended also claims to never read it., and I have other shit to be doing, like building a wall around my house, getting my black belt, fortifying my home security, hiring a bodygaurd and other such shit since so many hardmen a will layeth a slap upon me..what with the net it has for 7 years.

Saturday, May 13, 2017

Had a few nominations this week and decided to go for Dur the Gash for the main reason of the Catas Trophy debacle. It is almost 9 days now without a single ticket sold for this event.

They really are the comedy gift that keeps on giving, and only made better by its simple retarded autistic fans trying as they will to defend it and make excuses. One clownshoe even went as far as to claim it would be full as people would pay at the door on arrival, since Barry is such a metropolis and hub of commercial activity and a world heritage center for tourism.
I cannot wait for the empty hall to have giant stained curtains hanging from the balcony that many a coal scavenger has previously hung themselves off to hide the empty hall and the lights down so low that a knitting needle will be almost impossible to see.
Lets hope the public toilets have solid working doors or we might get a repeat of the last bdo darkness event where the sound of flushing toilets echoed around the hall like a hollow warehouse.
Dont get me started on the prize money, or the advertising for this ...MAJOR...

Popcorn teeth was also the cunt who once tried to berate the PDC for its fancy dress, walk on girls, etc, citing you would not see that in the BDo, till weeks later there was walk on girls in a bdo event.
As for fancy dress, take a look at the black cloud in this pic.
Fairly apt she should dress as a cow,

Also a special mention for Genetic throwback and poor mans Peter Stringfellow, the Chairman of the EDO , the man that had no idea that a former treasurer of his in county darts threw thousands into a slot machine, and the pensioner who can drive a wimpy gay waiter to making death threats, yes, that pony tailed simpleton Tommy Toerag Thompson, who announced that England would not be sending a team to the World Cup in Japan.
Seems the FOUR FUCKING YEARS they had to get ready for it was somehow not enough and the excuse was it would cost £30k, which itself was total bullshit as some of it would be subsidized by the BDO.
But suppose it was 30k, last time I checked there was 43 counties playing darts in England, so if they collected a mere 3 pound fifty a week of each county for the 4 years they would have made more than 30grand, remember these are the people who claimed thousands upon thousands each week attend county darts, its proper darts, the backbone etc, these people are so called fanatics.
Yet these same people do not attend events, not buy tickets, in fact they do not even watch the events that are even streamed, cos it might interfere with their drinking, which is the crux of their existence.

On the forums the mushrooms as usual tried to makes excuses for the EDO, whilst others laughed at them for not sending a team, but in hindsight does it really matter ?
Who really gives a fuck if England are there or not, even if they won it, it is a pointless event, no one gives a flying fuck about except those who thought they were going on a freebie.
Like Scott Mitchell who claimed  he  was "numb",, maybe thats why Popcorn Teeth dressed up as a cow to turn him on and make him forget about Japan .
I would be shocked if even those superleague and county players know anything about the world cup or its history, or who won the last one or where its held,  it makes the PDC World Cup seem like the FIFA football one..

Another week and yet again that poisonous little cunt Warty running his mouth. Seems after he choked in the Danish Open like he was in the first round at Lakeshite, he tried to confront some member of the audience who turned up for the comedy.
Cos we all know how old men approaching 60 years of age under five foot 2 inches who are pissed to the eyeballs are such dangerous street fighters. Those big tall Danes in attendance must have been shitting themselves when the imposing and virile scottish cunt started throwing shapes.

And a mention for that kerb crawling hunchbacked cunt MVG who got raped by Coco the clown last Sunday.
I think this post sent to me  by a member of the sums it up beautifully
Firstly this week a quick mention to the Scottish Thumbelina who tried to attack a member of the Danish public straight after the defeat that won the miniature Cum guzzler last week's award.
Fortunately Geert de Vos managed to step in before the child in question managed to hit the wartless one with that many lefts the dwarfy cunt was begging for a right.
Next up is a big shout going out to the BDO (catas)trophy who unfortunately haven't sold ONE fucking ticket for this event in a entire week!... yet the event is still taking place as the mushrooms and Summer teeth Sue (aye, some are black some are green & some are fuckin missing) reckon the crowds will be reminiscent of a pilgrimage to mecca and be climbing over one another to pay on the door when & if this pile of dog wank actually takes place.
Stepping up to lay claim to this week's award is the misshapen fat Dutch shitbag Michael van Gerwen, yes the man whose oversized pumping hips have left more prostitutes laying star shaped and gasping for air than the Suffolk strangler has ironed out all his rivals with his performance last Sunday night against his usual bitch Peter Wright.
Not only did the cunt with a streetwalker season ticket get beat, he got fucking annihilated 6-0 by a painted bow legged mongoloid with a Buddha belly and a Vietnamese pot bellied pig wife who only stops fucking eating when her arms get tired.
How fucking humiliating must that have been for the Dutch Down Syndrome merchant as his usual gurgling rape victim fought back for once and bummed the snot out of his pantomime horse sized back end just for a fucking change.
Yep, no matter how much the Yul Brynner with a under active thyroid problem pulled his socks up or put on that fake fucking cough he couldn't manage to shake the clowns love root from rattling away at his clay pipe like a salvation army tambourine.
No surprise really as all cunts that live in windmills have a genetic predisposition for waving the white flag brought on by their masters in jackboots from bygone days.
And lastly a mention for those lazy cunts not attending the EuroTour this weekend.
I guess allowances can be made for Taylor who is retiring anyway, and MVG who claimed he is preparing for the PL finals night, and to be fair he does not miss many , and also Ando who has qualified.

However Lewis and Barney who wont be at the PL next thursday proved yet again what lazy useless cunts they are. Remember before the Premier League  participants were announced and Fatpot and Barney promised to make more of an effort ?

I said at the time those 2 lying fat cunts did this just cos the PL selection was on, and now the PL is done and dusted for the most part, those 2 sweat hogs are back to their lazy routine, and in the meantime we got a euro tour with extra Gibraltar jobbers, making todays euro tour possibly the worst opening day Euro tour I have ever witnessed even if the standard was still better than what you get in the bdo.

Friday, May 5, 2017

This weeks main article was written by a member of The Darts Forum who wrote this beautiful piece.

Runner up this week has got to be the BDO who have managed to sell less tickets for the world (catas)trophy than the Joseph Mengle appreciation society shifted for their annual Auschwitz baby shower.
Is this down to the old men of the travel club that stink of stale piss and throw darts like they are suffering the latter stages of glaucoma?.....then again it may be the venue, a fucking doss pit that makes Potters gaff look like a five star hotel and the only reason the doors are open is the local authority are using the place as a leper colony as no self respecting dog would be seen dead curling one out in the place.
On to this weeks winner and once (yet) again the one and only Ross "the boss" Montgomery smashes the ball out of the park with his performance at the Denmark masters.
Firstly this knee high ringlicker leaped on the stage for his match with Yoeri "feather" Duijster playing the air guitar and looking like a bespectacled condensed version of the Yorkshire ripper with his recently acquired new facial hair.
He then went on to batter his awestruck opponent quicker than Fred West showing a new lodger to her room, and within minutes the wartless one was 4-0 up in a race to five.
Unfortunately the jock wankbag that measures the same length as your average skidmark came undone at this point as his opponent went from not being able to hit water if he fell out of a fucking boat to throwing the sort of darts flung by your average pissed up pub league player.
This was more than enough as the bowels of the warty one dropped out quicker than the septum on Daniella Westbrook after a night ploughing snow with Pablo Escobar and the primordial dwarf cunt lost five on the bounce as he choked faster than Mamma Cass gnawing down on a ham sandwich.
 For any of ye that fancy a bit of comedy, you can watch the choking cunt HERE  from the 2 hour 32 minute mark lose the plot and shit himself.

A mention this for the WDF and its partners ... the  previous Belgian event that was cancelled and the simpletons who bought tickets that were entitled to 3 free drinks at the next event, will have to go thirsty a bit longer as more events are being cancelled.
wonderful news.

Was also wonderful to see that fat hunchbacked dutch kerb crawling sack of human shit get his huge arse handed to him by Taylor in the Premier League, right after Ando beat him last sunday in the players championships.That will soften his cough a little.

In a break of tradition a shout out to The human Calculator and his wife Lorraine who took the recent award in good spirits., and even got the "on the buses" pic put on T-shirts.
Makes a change to see a couple not act like utter scum unlike the fat gay waiter and the livestock he married, or the depressed piss color dentured bitch and her expenses fiddling cuckold cunt of a husband.
Its off putting to give an award to a couple and not be told I "will be sorted out" by some internet hardman, or  told "the net is closing" ( which it has been for 6 fucking years) or "your time is coming" then if  Dean Winstanley was given my address he would still go for the wrong number house if his track record with numbers is anything to go by.
A mention for that 4 eyed shakin stevens impersonator and plumber from north Wales who looked stephen hawkins on pcp chucking darts tonight. He should fuck off and join the other coal scavenging has beens like Pot Noodle boy and Barrie Gimpy Bates back in the slagheaps.

And of course, a special mention for the fat scouse supporting cunt Stephen Bunting, the gut that ran amok in the BDO and a full time jobber in the PDC
An unemployed dwarf cunt from Rochdal once claimed there was only 2 players in the world better than Bunting, and other idiots actually believed him. ...I shit thee not...
Presently Bunting is not even in the top 100 for qualification for the 64 man Players Championships Finals....he lies 104th in the much for third best player in the world.
Cunt lost today again first round with an 84 average.
The only thing Bunting has an outside chance of winning this year is the poll on darts forum to vote for the fattest head in darts....he is currently in 3rd place.

To cast your vote go HERE

Friday, April 28, 2017

This weeks award was a tough choice with so many contenders scattered across multiple countries.
The winner is Rob MacDougall. For those not up to date on this weeks comedy  this is the guy in the UK "helping" out the organizers of the Danish Open.
When both Jobber Martin Atkins entered the Danish competition he took it upon himself to somehow think there was a mistake as there was not two Martin Atkins, despite both have a different second initial, and decided he will call one Mark McGeeney....except Mark McGeeney was not going and when the Martin Atkins went to find out why he was not in the draw he was told he was not entered.

Then this fucking Muppet rob starts crying about how its the last time he will help out.
How the fuck did he help ? He cost a player a spot in a comp, and when Atkins tried to get it sorted it was too late.
Take a look at this fucking moron who is not happy while trying to suck up to the jobber player.
Seems his only knowledge of a sovereign country like Denmark is Lurpak butter

Makes you wonder what sort of spastics in Denmark would ask for his advice in the first place, be best if they ignored his "advice and help" in the future.

The BDO/WDF clusterfucks were not just limited to Denmark.
This week in Belgium a country famous for chocolate and kiddy fiddling some jobber event was cancelled only 12 days before it was due to start. How does the organizers expect to refund those who coughed up ?
By offering them 3 free drinks at some other event which may or may not happen.
Drink is the absolute sole reason and bond for all bdo/wdf scum conventions, where darts is secondary to the piss up. Its how these people view the game, you only need look at the travel club and its ventures to the shitholes of Europe for pittance, raffle tickets and ranking points in the hope of one day playing in a run down hotel in Surrey. which is the pinnacle of piss ups, a week long extravaganza of sweaty tracksuit wearing chavs and pissheads with only primary education comparing gold college rings they bought in cash converters to match the gold chain on the outside of their football jersey that is stinking of sweat, vomit and  covered beer stains.

Not to be outdone by Denmark and Belgium, Scotland also made a bid. The Scots decided only this week they would not be sending a team to the World Cup in Japan...yes that WDF World Cup, the one we are always hearing about , how its the pinnacle of International Darts, the highest honour and other such outlandish horseshit. The tightfisted cunts just realized they cannot afford it...theres a shock....despite them having FOUR FUCKING YEARS TO GET READY FOR IT. It was hardly out of the blue this came up. Guess International Darts is not as important as were told then, who saw that coming ?

Another country not wanting to be left out is that shitstain on the map, the valley of coal scavengers Wales, or Whales when you refer to those things born as women. Seems people cannot enter the Welsh open and those who have or want information are being ignored constantly over some petty hassle going on. Read this on the Darts Forum

Noel Gates
I have phoned prostatyn over 80 times without reply.. Booking form sent in month's ago and nothing..Phoned head office twice and told they would get someone to contact me ASAP again nothing..Sent emails and nothing...Only flights are booked I'd say fu#k the Welsh open...Very disappointed in the way this has turned out,never had this trouble any other year....What's happened

‪Neil Duff ‬
‪Heard a rumour they r in dispute with Welsh darts over sponsor or something. Wouldn't like to think this is on a knife edge‬

‪Gerard Lehane ‬
‪Oh FFS not another possible scenario ahead! There has been enough already this week!‬

‪Neil Duff ‬
‪It's a nitemare buddy. No wonder I'm off. Who would be bothered with this shit‬

‪Gerard Lehane ‬
‪It's absolutely ridiculous mate. It's loyal players to the BDO like yourself I feel sorry for. The past week has been a constant stream of bad news and problems! I think record numbers at PDC Q School will be had next January‬

Prostatyn ??? Sounds like Martin Adams arsehole , which is apt for a place name in Wales.
I am sure the thick cunt meant Prestatyn, but another fuck up in yet another event in yet another country under the BDO /WDF banner.

Next up is the USA, some dopey bitch a few weeks started a petition for some equal shit for Munters or something, not exactly sure as I have zero interest in that shit. She turned up this week on the Darts forum crying over the people who responded and the names they used.
The person most upset was Deta Hedman's personal houseboy, the chubby simpleton with an unhealthy preoccupation with me. He said all the false names were my idea, despite there being zero proof of that anywhere, still as long as he is upset it might stop the retarded cunt from contacting me and begging for something which he has often done,and now  he dont need me anymore, he has new people to contact with more influence than me...yep thats right, the moron has contacted Richard Branson begging.
The guy has taken whoring himself out to a whole new level.

 Lisa Higginson Munt
If so many teams can't go, surly WDF have to move it? Doesn't matter if it's it the top seeds or the lowest seeds who can't go surly every country should be able to afford to send a squad? Such a shame! Send an article to all the nationwide newspapers you never know some rich person may read it and send your teams!!

Paul James
Unfortunately most companies think darts begins and ends with the PDC , very hard to promote international darts as coverage of world cups isn't the best .
England have spoken to many companies , even Richard Branson at virgin were asked .

Who is next to be asked....remember Frank Warren ?

No week would be complete without some mention of Popcorn and the Cuckold.
I read on a forum she is suffering from depression. I hope she recovers soon and is back at her post overseeing the ticket sales for the Catas Trophy, (snigger) and her cunt of a husband can get back to doing what he does best by visiting forum owners and charging up his petrol to expenses.
I want the Williams to carry on in their job til the BDO is fucking broke, finished and dead.

After all these complete fuck ups in multiple countries, I almost forgot to mention Dave Chisnall who you must admit is the most consistent choker in the PDC since the antique dealer.
He will never win a tv event the choking cunt.

A mention for Fatpot too who not only jobbed to Wade yet again but lost to MVG, too.
Of course losing to MVG is not  a shock but he was completely battered.

Matt Porter, and his 4 month investigation into some foreign jobber for match fixing at the last World championships. Good luck in proving that. It was hardly Darryl Fitton, Gary Anderson or Gary Jobson levels where it was obvious.

And lastly, I am sure there will be no shortage of delicate little souls who will be upset at the likes of me laughing at the bdo , its players, and its ignorant fans .
I am sure some more new cunts will join the long list of cunts who think giving me a slap or acting like a hardman will somehow change things.
I see a couple of spud munching micks think giving people a slap will sort me out. like it will somehow make what I say on here not true.
Oddly no one from the PDC has ever threatened to sort me out....strange that, its always scum from the other side of the divide who think if they turn up at my door and act the hardman the bdo will somehow be less of a joke, the fat munters will turn into supermodels, Glen Durrant will look normal, Tony O Shea will win a competition, the BDO might sell more than 2 tickets for an event in a 24 hour period, The BBC will come begging to show their events and other deluded dreams.

Some other comments I enjoyed across the forums this week
Fucking spoiled for choice this week.
I didn't think the Floreal Masters being sacked off 12 days before happening, causing the players to lose large amounts of cash and be offered THREE FUCKING DRINKS as compo could be eclipsed.
Then along pops Robert MacDougall, whoever the fuck he is, to frankly romp home with his outstanding effort.
This cunt fucked over the obviously talented Martin Atkins (the shitter one, not the shit one with the dodgy arm and haircut) by changing his entry into the Denmark Open to Mark McGeeney. Losing him his flight and accommodation costs. Not to mention the ranking points, which are more precious to the travel jobbers.
Absolutely hysterical scenes on the Fanatics, as Atkins laid straight into the tournament organisers, slagging them left right and centre. Oblivious to the fact that good old Robert had fucked it all for him, making him look a right cunt.
Cue good old Auntie Sue to the rescue with an email to the organisers, who took one look at it and totally ignored the dopey old cunt and left him out anyway.


- Organisers of Belgian ranking events for cancelling with 12 days notice
- Robert MacDougal for causing Martin Atkins to miss the Danish ranking events
- Matt Porter for claiming a match fixing investigation against a player is taking 4 months
- The WDF for the continued World Cup farce with teams pulling out (or at least pondering it)
- The BDO for the continued WDT farce, with only two tickets sold since 11am Sunday and people seemingly unable to enter the qualifier online
There will be more players than spectators at this event, it promises to be comedy gold.
Can see it now, a shaky camera, light of to darken the shithole, but it wont mask the sound or hollow echos, shit darts flung by pub players playing for pittance.

Friday, April 21, 2017

This week the award goes to the Human Calculator, the man who in a total coincidence suffered an injury  which ruled him out for months the exact minute he was banned by the PDC.
All a coincidence.

This week he and his wife decided to relive the golden days of the last century in typical bdo style by advertising their new idea of a pub crawl on a bus which ends in an exhibition. See Here

Imagine that bus load of fucking pissheads , munters, jobbers and cunts ending up in your local after a days drinking, it would be some exhibition alright.

As one member on The Darts forum wrote:

Special mention this week for the Winstanleys.

After fucking up his career in the PDC and following his Mrs around on the munters tour, big Deano and his Mrs have decided to roll back the years and recreate On the Buses, 21st Century style, by inviting all to join them on a bus tour of the shabby working men's clubs of the West Midlands for the princely sum of £70 a pop. What better way to blow your hard earned than to join Arthur and Olive on a throwback to the days of the miners strike, the three day week , social disharmony etc.
Yorkshire v the Greats of the West Midlands, bring it on.

Also a mention this week for Sue the Gash and her cunt husband who are doing a wonderful job for the BDO. Still no mention of the prize money for the Catas Trophy, let alone the news of what TV channel its on...oh wait...darts on tv is a bad thing.
Lets hope Popcorn and the Cuckold stay in charge of the BDO and wont stop til they complete their mission of killing the bdo dead til even the flies in the shit fuck off..

A mention also for Gary Anderson who was 4-0 up on Taylor and then lost the next 7 legs on the trot....what were the odds on that...I bet Ando knew.

James Wade, time for him to be fucked out of the Premier League. as he is stinking up a comp that is already starting to bore me as it goes on to long, not helped by seeing Mardle and that squinty eyed shakin stevens impersonator rattle on.
Also the last time he was kicked out of the PL it actually helped his game..

And of course no weekend of PDC darts would be complete without one of the most consistent groups in the history of darts doing what they do best.

Yes I am referring to the JOB Squad, the likes of Pecker woods , a former Lakeshite semi finalist going out with a 71 average, the likes of Jeffrey Giraffe and Kong and other jobbers who did well at Lakeshite receive their usual beating in the first round.
No surprise this weeks KotW winner Winstanley was also a member of this illustrious group.

Friday, April 14, 2017

This week the winner was decided by members on the Darts and this is a write up by one if its members which is a thing of beauty :

What a calamitous week we have had with every man, woman and invisible fuckin dog vying for the most prestigious title in world darts, the one and only Knob Of The Week.
Multiple previous winner, chairperson of the BDO and Robbie Coltraine drag act Sue Getty Williams put in a valiant attempt to hold on to her thorny crown by turning the oldest major in "world" darts the Winmau World Masters into a mid-week camera free zone in fucking Bridlington......yes, good old Brid, a place that godforsaken the fucking asylum seekers cannot climb back in their dinghies quick enough to escape the Gaza Strip of the North.
In another stroke of sheer genius auntie Sue the woman that visits a archaeologist rather than a dentist managed to get the World (catas)Trophy relegated from Potters emporium of excrement to a even bigger doss hole in south Wales by the name of the Memo arts centre.
Hopefully this event isn't televised as the Memo looks like Cruise Missile practice range and the only reason the fucking windows are boarded up is to stop the rough sleepers from escaping.
Unfortunately all these efforts from the woman whose charred teeth look like vandalised gravestones are in vain as outright winner this week is the biggest joke in PROFESSIONAL darts.
Step forward Peter "snakebite" Wright who steamrollered this week's other contenders by sinking quicker than Andy Fordham dancing in quicksand not once but TWICE last night.
This painted spastic with a penchant for firing his population paste into the super morbidly obese found himself 4-0 then 5-1 up against the prozzie rider before the seal on his colostomy bag blew off like the top of Kurt Cobains head & the silly looking cunt could only manage to gurgle his way to a draw against his master.
This Heimlich manoeuvre masterclass was then followed by Ronald Mcdonald turning a 2-1 lead against the jock Mr Magoo into a 7-2 hammering as once again the clowns dinner hit his underpants quicker than Donald Campbell's skull struck Coniston Water.
Rolls Royce choking and a worthy winner indeed.

It was as succinct  as it was eloquent, almost brought a tear to my eye...calm down jabba, ....dont get your hopes up as I got 2..
The frightening thing is this was the first week Krusty has won the award, when you consider how often he chokes you have to wonder how bad were those who pipped him for the award.
I liked how Ando said after his first match against Chizzy thursay night how he was looking forward to playing Wright, think he wanted to batter him which he did for pretending to be a scot.

Here is the English cunt in all his glory

Other people needing a mention beside Popcorn teeth for moving the Masters to a slag heap in the land that time forget are Phil Taylor who blew not only the chance to beat Wade by a large margin he ended up losing the match, and Wade was shit for the majority of the match. Cunt should fuck off before he becomes any more of a laughing stock and object of ridicule and pity, we already have the bdo for that.

And of course Dave Chisnall, it is like Krusty, you just know the choke is coming, and sure enough he missed 7 darts to win the match. It was like Krusty at 5-1 you still could not see the Tony O Shea impersonator winning.

Friday, April 7, 2017

Apologies for the late news this week as I was in the pub,and that is my excuse.
What is Sue the Gash excuse for the silence coming out of the BDO ?

This week the winmau Masters which is laughingly referred to as the "2nd biggest bdo major" is reported,,,and by reported I mean a bed and breakfast broke the news that the masters will now be held in Bridlington  in midweek in September.
It took a player who once played on Bob Potters piss soaked stage of shit to break the news on forums that a bed and breakfast confirmed themasters news , and still nothing from the BDO.

I guess they are busy what with updating their site with all the news on the World Darts CatasTropy...oh wait...

As for Bridlington, this quote by a resident of the dump sums the place up
 A random patchwork of violent council estates and traveller sites by the murky waters of the North Sea, makes this town one of the worst places to live in England, even before the extra bonus of the entire Giro cashing population of Hull, Sheffield & Doncaster (three of the nastiest towns in the north) decamping here for the summer months.

Beirut with Seaside Rock & Tat shops, Bridlington offers those of a Chav persuasion two additional favourite hang outs aside from the usual joys of wrecking children’s playgrounds or necking Mad Dog 20/20 Kiwi & Lime outside Sports Direct – the “fair” and the arcade.

Both of these are Chav institutions, with the fair consisting of a sea of Chavs, screaming incessantly as they are packed onto badly constructed rides by mean looking pikeys, all to the backdrop of 300 strobe lights and 3 year old handbag house at ear bleeding volume. Chavs could then hit the arcade, where the kids are abandoned to play in the traffic outside the door whilst Mum & Dad (or partner anyway) blow the incapacity benefit on the fruities & jumbo dogs.

If you ever have to visit this god-forsaken corner of Yorkshire, make sure it is out of season, when the smog of Mayfair Superkings clears slightly, you can walk around without having to avoid pools of part digested chips and you don’t have to look at huge crowds of fat, bare midriffed biffers taking their alsatians for a shit on the beach.

The world would be a better place without midgets, and their napoleon complex's and insecurities.
One forum has mushroom midgets moaning so much it has practically killed their site and drove away its members. and speaking of stunted midget cunts a mention for the inbred yorkshite midget Doggy Dawson. This simpleton had to go on a facebook group to find out details about events seeing as Popcorn teeth was bushing fingering herself watching a Ken Dodd VHS to post anything on the bdo webshite.
The funniest part is Dopey Dawson has not even qualified for the event, which led to one person claim he already got a wildcard, for an event no one knows when it is on or even if it is on.
And if true he has won a wildcard, where was the announcement or why were others not made aware.

Another vertically and mentally challenged cunt that deserves a mention is that shitstain Warty Montgomery who in his typical bitter jealousy and dwarf anger has been taking shots at Paul hogan and Cameron Menzies. A truly poisonous little cunt with small man syndrome who even with his "17 pieces of lucky jewellery" has never been anything but a grade A fucking jobber cunt.
Moaning about Paul Hogan playing and winning a comp in Benidorm...with a 70 average as well as having a dig at Cameron Menzies for not going to Germany.
What the fuck has it got to do with that dwarf cunt is another story, and there is no shortage...excuse the pun...of people who think Warty is a total cunt.
I particularly liked this nomination
My pick for this week is the BDO'S answer to Tattoo from Fantasy Island & professional rulebook page turner Ross "The Boss" Montgomery.
This fence painting miniscule maggot and cack rash on the underpants of "toy" darts had a little sob this week as Paul Hogan took a few days off from appearing in police identification parades for "he touched me merchants" to lay waste to the competition in Benidorm.
McLoyalty went on a rant because Hogan and Daniella Westbrooks apprentice Cameron Menzies decided to give this comp a punt rather than head out to Germany with the rest of the travel club spastics on the piss riddled seats of the sunshine bus.
Hopefully some kraut nonce mistakes the petite porridge slurping parasite for a little kid this weekend and pulls a Ben Needham on the doss little warty wankbag.
The vindictive little cunt won't be missed.